New beginnings often come with curiosity, excitement, feelings of uncertainty and challenges. My journey as a new teacher has been no different. Over the last year I have not only been forced to look at yoga through a beginners lens but I have also taught and lived yoga through a beginners lens. Everytime I stepped into the studio I was met with mixed feelings and new challenges. I was forced to break down movements in my body to figure out how to direct others to perform them in theirs. I’ve had to relearn my left and my right (which has become the opposite of all of yours), I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone and into areas which can be uncomfortable for me such as sitting in stillness and being in front of a roomful of adults (I literally cried at the end of of my first few classes!). Most often I would show up, look out at those of you that came to my class and wonder if you could sense the “imposter” standing in front of you. I felt like I would fake my way through a sequence and at the end be ready to be carted away for being a fraud. Surely someone was going to figure out that I didn’t know what the heck I was doing but I kept going because I was having fun and that was enough for me!
The more I taught over the last year, the more comfortable I’ve become. Over time I’ve started to let go of my self perceived imperfections and shortcomings. The more I teach, the more I realize that I am going to mess up occasionally (or often). I am going to say the wrong thing at times. Some days I am going to hit the ball out of the park and some days I am going to fall on my butt. And most importantly, I have come to realize that not everyone is going to like my style of teaching, but instead of worrying about that, I stay true to myself and my reasons for teaching. I love what yoga has given me and want to share that with others. After all, that is why I became a teacher!
Gradually I have humbled myself to the fact that I am learning, and that is okay. I have realized that my students appreciate when I admit to not having all the answers, when I fall out of balance postures, or when I openly acknowledge my blunders and shortcomings (which is pretty often lol!). I’m a yoga teacher and a human being!
This past year has taught me to stay curious and to continue to explore new things. The world is full of uncertainty and it’s best to embrace it, breathe and not be afraid to put yourself out there. Everything has a beginning and there is something to learn and gain through diving in and trying something new or out of your comfort zone. My challenge to you all is to find your new beginning, dip your toe in the water or just dive in head first! You might just be happy that you did!